Calling all silver surfers and pensioners! We have a little old lady who needs to find a Dressmaker’s Dummy as soon as possible. She plans to sew into a vast old age to eke out her meagre pension. In this way she plans to thwart the FNPF muppets. 

It doesn’t have to be a new dummy, but it must be adjustable because ladies come in adjustable sizes. Our little old lady would like it to be in fairly good condition, and she is willing to pay a fair price for it. (Blow up dolls excepted). 

Since our little old lady is still able to see, speak, and hear, even though her use-by date expired long ago, she is still able to drive and will be more than happy to collect her purchase. 

Fijipensioners.com confirms that this is a genuine request – please see her advertisement in the ‘wanted to buy’ column in the Fiji Times 07/1.