It is important for men to remember that as women grow older, it
becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping
as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at
them. Some are oversensitive, and there’s nothing worse than an
My name is John. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my
wife, Lin. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for
Lin to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for
extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly
after she started working I noticed she was beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets
home from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to
rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don’t yell at
her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she
gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men’s Grill
at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I’m ready for some
home-cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating, but now
it’s not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after
dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times
each evening that they won’t clean themselves. I know she really
appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done
before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining. I think. For example she
will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly
bills during her lunch hour.
But, boys, we take ’em for better or worse, so I just smile and
offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even
three days. That way she won’t have to rush so much. I also remind
her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn’t hurt her any
— if you know what I mean. I like to think tact is one of my strong
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest
periods. She had to take a break when she was only half-finished
mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I’m a fair man. I tell
her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed
lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one
for herself, she may as well make one for me too.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Lin.
I’m not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men
will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows
better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older.
However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less
criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider
that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this
earth to help each other.
John died suddenly on February 7 of a perforated rectum. The police
report says he was found with a Calloway extra-long 50-inch Big
Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end and a sledge hammer
laying nearby. His wife, Lin, was arrested and charged with murder.
The all-woman jury took only 10 minutes to find her Not Guilty,
accepting her defense that John, somehow without looking, accidentally
sat down on his golf club.
La Passionara said:
What a ‘dear John’ letter!
John sounded like a spoilt husband who did absolutely nothing around the house, no wonder Lin was tired all the time!!