Posted by fijipensioners | Filed under Daily Humour
Irony
10 Monday Nov 2014
10 Monday Nov 2014
09 Sunday Nov 2014
08 Saturday Nov 2014
07 Friday Nov 2014
01 Saturday Nov 2014
21 Tuesday Oct 2014
Posted Daily Humour
in While stitching a cut on the hand of an old farmer, whose hand was caught in the squeeze gate while working cattle, the doctor struck up a conversation with the old man.
Eventually the topic got around to politicians and their role as our leaders.
The old rancher said, “Well, most politicians are ‘Post Turtles’.”
Not being familiar with the term, the doctor asked what a ‘post turtle’ was.
The old rancher said, “When you’re driving down a country road you come across a fence post with a turtle balanced on top, that’s a post turtle.”
Seeing the puzzled look on the doctor’s face so he explained.
“You know he didn’t get up there by himself, he doesn’t belong up there, he doesn’t know what to do while he’s up there, he’s elevated beyond his ability to function,and you just wonder what kind of dumb arse put him up there to begin with.”
Best explanation of a modern politician I’ve ever heard.
09 Thursday Oct 2014
08 Wednesday Oct 2014
Posted Daily Humour
in
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, she said “I was doing fairly well for my age”.
(I am past Seventy ).
A little concerned about that comment, I couldn’t resist asking her, ‘Do you think I’ll live to be 80?’
She asked, ‘Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer, wine or hard liquor?’
‘Oh no,’ I replied. ‘I’m not doing drugs, either!’
Then she asked, ‘Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?’
‘I said, ‘Not much… My former doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!’
‘Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, boating, sailing, hiking, or bicycling?’
‘No, I don’t,’ I said.
She asked, ‘Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or have a lot of sex?’
‘No,’ I said…
She looked at me and said, ‘Then, why do you even give a shit?’
12 Tuesday Aug 2014
Posted Daily Humour
in12 Saturday Jul 2014